


Hidden truths

by Shadowdianne



Category: Rizzoli & Isles
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-05
Updated: 2015-04-24
Packaged: 2018-03-21 09:16:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3686739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowdianne/pseuds/Shadowdianne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Companion Piece of "Truths that are lies" Prompt made by Awesome23 on FF.net.</p>
<p> Maura is moving away from Jane after the bridge situation so when Jane starts trying to bring her best friend back to her side she might find that is already too late... Ratings may change</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Everybody talks

**Everybody talks**

_Everybody talks, too much-Neon Trees "Everybody talks"_

The sun was setting on Boston city when Jane exited the precinct, her tired eyes inspecting mechanically the road in front of her as she maneuvered her car and joined with it to the now lazy car flux.

It had been a difficult day, one of those in which all she could actually think about at the end of it was drinking until everything started to fade away. She had few days like that but every time she had them she started to think that maybe her mother was right in how much she actually was paying for working as a cop. However, those feelings faded as quickly as the alcohol that she intended to burn that night and so she kept driving until the complex in where she lived was ahead of her, the empty apartment that waited for her as closed and dark as she had let it a few nights before. She couldn't exactly remember how much time had passed since the last time she had slept there but as she entered into the place and she turned on the lights the strange chill of an empty place punched her into her gut making her suddenly remember that she didn't actually had anything on her fridge. Not since Maura had asked her to put something in there it and she hadn't exactly done it, a conversation that they had had… two weeks ago.

Making a face because of the bittersweet idea she sat on her sofa and wondered if she could watch something on tv, or just sleep until the next day but her tired mind refused to sleep and Maura's face kept appearing even after she tried not to think about the other woman.

Since Jane's last incident and even after repeating more than a few times that she was fine Maura had started to find simple reasons to not be with Jane after her working hours. At first Jane thought that Maura was still a little mad at her because of her decision of jumping off a bridge without any backup plan. Something that was comprehensible even to the stubborn dark haired woman. But as days turned into weeks and Maura's behavior continued Jane's curiosity grew until it was deep fear of actually losing her best friend, the woman who she loved.

To be fair, Jane had thought in those few weeks in which the fear was starting to grow strong inside of her, she hadn't been the best friend herself this past year or so and after the bridge she had promised herself to make Maura believe that she thought that Maura was an incredible person. Sadly, or not, Maura wasn't the same person as Jane had first met and once her words had hit the wall of the curious but lost eyes of her best friend Jane had discovered the ugly truth: Maura didn't need to believe that she was good enough anymore since someone had actually replaced that fear with something else, something that Jane had been unable to provide.

And so Jack had been the last piece of a puzzle that, to be truthful, had been there for a really long time.

Jane's state was only the product of a month without being able to reach her best friend because she really didn't know the woman in front of her anymore. And Jane's deepest regret was actually being one of the first persons that hadn't been there for Maura, not as the good doctor had needed.

As the first tendrils of sleep started to caress her conscious mind Maura's voice filled her mind, making her think of that last conversation that she had had with her…

* * *

_Maura had been on the morgue, finishing a report of their latest case, her back was directed at Jane's and when the lanky brunette had entered in the room she had scanned Maura's figure for a little while before actually making her eyes wander through the place, ashamed of herself._

" _Maur" She had called "You ready?"_

" _Jane" Maura had said with a quick smile covering the strange look that the medical examiner directed Jane on a regular basis since their talk after the bridge._

_Jane automatically saw that Maura had apparently forgotten that they had planned to go to the place of the former one and see something on the TV as the medical examiner had promised. Again._

_Swallowing her pride and fear Jane tilted her head to one side and motioned the door at her back as she approached the still slightly startled woman._

" _Yes, me, you told me that today you were going to be free to have something together" Jane's voice died down when Maura looked away for a moment before returning her eyes back at her, this time filled with something that the Italian detective didn't actually discern as remorse._

" _Oh, Jane, I'm sorry, Jack told me this morning that he wanted to show me his latest project and I accepted"_

_Maura couldn't lie, not even after all she had lived this past few years, but the medical examiner had developed a complicated way to tell truths that weren't exactly real and so Jane doubted that Maura had forgotten about her previous appointment, she just have decided that Jane could wait. Like she had been doing for the last couple of weeks._

_Smiling tightly Jane turned; ready to go back to her floor to pick up the little bag of chocolates that she had bought to Maura in her lunch hour._

" _Until tomorrow then Maura, have a good time"_

_The coppery haired woman nodded at her when Jane turned once more as the elevator's doors closed behind her body but she never replied to Jane's words._

* * *

Jane woke up on her sofa with foggy thoughts and a dried mouth as her stomach rumbled. She looked at her sides trying to discern what could have woke her up when her phone beeped again answering her question.

Rubbing her eyes with her left hand she picked up the device and answered, noticing that judging by the music that came from the phone it was her mother the one who was calling her in the middle of the night.

"Ma" She answered while she yawned and arched her back as much as possible "Everything's alright?"

"Yes" Her mother's voice was soft and unhurried so Jane relaxed feeling that for whatever reasons her mother had decided that it was a good time to call her she wasn't in danger. "I only wanted to talk to you because as a mother one know things and notice others and I know you and I think that this has reached a point in which both of you need to talk"

"Mom?" Jane blinked perplexed when her mother finally finished her speech "What are you talking about? I'm ok"

"No, you aren't, and so I thought that it was time to make both of you talk about what happened with the bridge and after that because you desperately need to talk about it and I'm not someone who pretends that her family is ok when it isn't"

"Ma!" Jane exclaimed noticing that the only word she seemed to be able to utter was that since her mother's call "If you are talking about Maura and I we are fine, if this is because you haven't had Maura's home to yourself for a while remember that IS Maura's after all and…"

"I'm not talking about having her house to myself, Jane Clementine Rizzoli" Her mother boomed and Jane flinched slightly at the use of her full name. She didn't know where her mother was but as she couldn't really hear anything else apart from the older woman's voice she wanted to believe that she was alone and not with anyone that could make fun of her. "And you should know by now that I'm searching for a place of my own. No, you never could lie to me, not for long. So it's time to be the grown-up that you are always telling me you are and come here with your friend. Am I being clear?"

"I'm not going to go, Maura had a date with Jack and she is probably busy right now" Jane replied forcefully as she finally rose from the sofa "Besides, I don't know why you are calling me in the middle of the night for this when you could have told me this this morning when I saw you"

Jane heard her mother's sigh and she could picture her face as the older woman resumed with her speech.

"Jane, a mother knows things, can you please come?"

But Jane was stubborn and even if she could hear the plea on her mother's tone and she suspected that she was going to be lectured later she shook her head and took a deep intake of breath before replying. Her voice came out deeper and rougher that she had meant and she cursed herself because for a moment the sadness that she had been feeling since the first night in where Maura didn't appear came out, loud and clear for her mother trained hearing

"I can't Ma, I'm sorry."

And with that she hung up the phone, refusing to hear the rebuttal that her mother was already saying on the speaker.


	2. The sound of silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ah, I repeat here again in case you found it odd; I’m not following the series events so the murders and everything aren’t going to be the same, bear with me, I promise nothing gruesome is going to come from this (?)
> 
> PD: To the worried ones, I’m a rizzles fan but I’m going to make Jane sweat a little since her character development is something I have being hating since they started changing her. I’m going to try to focus on that before doing any romantic movement, hope you stick with me!

_And in the naked light I saw […]_

_[…]People hearing without listening- Simon and Garfunkel “The sound of silence”_

The first rays of Monday’s morning sun touched the dead’s body skin at the same time Jane arrived at the scene still trying to put tendrils of her hair behind her ears, sleep had been elusive once again and when the central had called her she had needed a few more minutes than normal to feel strong enough to go to the murder scene.

Making a face at the decomposed corpse she cracked her neck and started trying to find any clues near the victim’s body. Maura was already there, kneeled next to the corpse and taking notes while instructing some of the lab guys to pick fragments that she later would be processing.

Jane opened her mouth and tried to greet Maura but her mother’s voice filled up her mind for the umpteenth time since the woman had called her. Coughing soundlessly she tried to focus on the corpse once again, painfully aware that in another circumstances she would have made a prank about the state of the corpse and Maura would have replied with some scientific fact.

As she touched the faded lines of what appeared to be signs of burned car tires she glanced back at Maura who seemed to be engrossed on the body’s clothes. She swallowed and smiled a strained grin; her lips were stretched over her teeth and when she talked her voice sounded even deeper than usual.

“Hei, morning” She rasped and when Maura finally looked over her right shoulder from her position near the body’s head Jane rose her left hand and saluted to the other woman. “What do you think?”

“I’m going to need a little more time to know about the cause of death and the exact time frame” Maura replied after greeting her with a quick smile “There are a few conspicuous stains on her thorax and what seems to be powder but I will let you know later”

Jane hummed and opened her mouth once again, glancing back at the body for a second before stretching and approaching Maura in one long step, her body thrumming with nervousness as the other woman looked at her with a questioning gaze shining on her eyes.

To be truthful Maura hadn’t exactly changed her way to interact with Jane, not in the most superficial way at least. But now, every time Jane tried to make jokes or just be with the medical examiner, she found herself thrown against a very strange crystal wall; she could see Maura but couldn’t reach her and so every time they talked had turned out to be a strange dance in where Jane tried to be herself with Maura while Maura replied to her politely but not warmly. And that was another thing that made Jane nervous and unbalanced, as if she was a kid caught while trying to sneak the cookies from the jar.

“Eh, Maura, I was… how was your date? My mother called me in the middle of the night and I worried a little for a sec but it was just my mother trying to be my mother” Her voice sounded forced and she smiled quickly to one of the forensic while the man finished with whatever Maura had asked for and handed to her. When the man smiled back at her and turned she looked back to Maura, the woman already reading something on her phone and smiling as if her mind was in somewhere else “Maura?”

“Yes, sorry Jane, what were you saying?” The medical examiner asked sweetly to her while she pocketed her phone, the device chirping one more time as Jane sighed and shook her head, strangely disappointed with herself and the situation.

“Nothing, I… only wanted to know how your date was”

Maura beamed at that and for a second she looked ready to share everything with Jane but then a cloud covered her face and Maura glanced at her quickly before replying caustically as she busied herself with her tools.

“It was delicious, I’m going to give you the address of the restaurant where we ate, they had some interesting plates that you could enjoy”

“We can go together some night we both have it free” Jane replied but she knew already that they weren’t going to make it and so when Maura nodded distractedly she knew it was her cue to leave. The body seemed to have been mugged and now she needed to start doing a report about it, unless Maura discovered something different of course.

“Well, I’m going to go to the station, do you want help here or something?”

Maura shook her head and while she smiled at her it didn’t reach her eyes which turned sad the moment Jane pretended she wasn’t focusing on them

“Ok, then I’ll see you later”

As she drove away from the murder scene and approached the precinct she sighed, wanting to scream at the top of her lungs.

At first she had been terrified when she felt the difference on Maura’s behavior towards herself, the first impression was that maybe something had happened on the other woman’s life, like her mother or her sister being in danger but it hadn’t been that and after that moment of confusion came the mild anger when she realized that the woman’s change was only applied to her. Maura repeated once and again she wasn’t mad at Jane and knowing the inability of Maura to lie Jane believed that. That didn’t explain what was happening though and after days of anger and confusion it came the sadness and remorse of something intangible she could feel floating between Maura and she but she couldn’t pinpoint what. Her family and friends weren’t aware of the problem- at least she had believed that until her mother’s call last night- and the way Maura had keep carrying herself next to them had dissuaded Jane to ask for help.

But, as her mother had repeated her every time she had broken something when she was little “If you feel bad it’s because of something” and so her remorse and sadness had started eating her alive. She had spent hours on her couch trying to discern what those feelings truly meant but they were silent and so, every time Maura and she interacted the sadness grew stronger inside of her.

“I’m just stupid” She whispered as she entered the station, her hands hurting a little because of the way she had been grabbing the steering wheel.

* * *

 

_After the failed attempt of making pasta with the broken tool both women had sat on the couch and ate what they were going to put inside the ravioli. Jane was still smiling a bit because of the way Maura had punched her right arm when she had started to play with the “kitchen thingy” and for a moment the quiet friendship had been between there, untroubled._

_Then, as Maura had yawned and had tried to cover her mouth with her right hand while her eyes closed a little, filled with sleep, Jane had put the TV on with a satisfied smirk playing on her lips._

_She had been worried because of Maura’s behaviors after her jump but the woman seemed to be more relaxed now and Jane sighed inwardly for that, happy to see her friend at ease with her once again._

_“It was delicious Maur” She said as she moped up the remaining of her plate “Next time I need to jump off a bridge I’m going to think twice because of this”_

_The tension inside the room grew until it was almost unbearable and as Maura’s body stiffened at Jane’s side the brunette woman knew she had made a mistake._

_“Jane” Whispered the other woman tiredly but her voice was empty and so the detective kept staring straight ahead of her, shame coloring her cheeks and making them burn._

_“I wanted to be funny” Jane replied lamely and as her voice died down she heard Maura sigh, making her swallowed nervously as she bit her tongue. Wincing in pain she glanced back at Maura; the woman’s eyes vacant and unfocused for a moment filled with something close to resignation._

_“Would you have think twice if I had been at her side instead of a few feet away?”_

_The question was said softly, almost as if Maura hadn’t expected herself to be able to ask it but Jane heard it nonetheless and as she glanced back at the other woman she frowned, feeling that something was up with the other woman but not quiet seeing what it was._

_“I told you” Jane finally said after a few more moments of silence “I love what I do, when I’m working my priority is catching the guilty. I… didn’t think of anyone, I just jumped.”_

_It was true, but she wasn’t saying the other part, the part where she had resurfaced from the river and her first thought had been Maura. She still wasn’t ready to admit it in front of the medical examiner and embarrassed of herself as she was she let the moment pass, telling herself she still could explain to Maura any other day._

_It seemed she hadn’t understand as much as she had first believed on the water because after she had dozed off in front of the TV she had felt soft hands covering her body with a blanket before Maura’s soft accent whispering something close to “I did miss you Jane”_

_After that their relationship had started to change._

* * *

 

Jane raised her head when her brother plopped on a chair after he had dragged it next to her desk. She had been daydreaming once again and the reports were still blank in front of her, waiting to be written.

“Sis” Frankie greeted her while munching something that looked as crackers. “New case?”

The woman hummed as she tried to put the papers in order, her hands grabbing nervously a pencil before she changed it for a pen.

“I’m going to need your help in case anything new comes up so I will send you the details about it” Jane replied as she started filling the starting code in the files.

“Fine by me” Frankie replied and for a moment he sat there, eating and reading the information from time to time over Jane’s shoulder.

At the beginning Jane found her brother’s presence something reassuring, and as nervous as she was she greeted the man’s sounds as he ate cracker after cracker from the little bag he had on his left hand but after a few minutes the sound of Frankie’s teeth against the biscuit made her nervous and so she cleared her throat, trying to make Frankie understand he was bothering her.

“Jane” The man asked her instead “Any reasons Ma would have send me here?”

**A/N Hi, a quick note, if anyone wants to know what Jane is talking about in the flashback scene there is a little one shot I made for Awesome23 that’s the root of this story. If anyone is interested it’s called “Truths that are lies”**


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One day I know you'll understand  
> That I didn't really have much choice  
> I just had to hide it- Mr. Hudson “White lies”

**White lies**

Even if the station was always filled with anxious movement and frantic sounds the time seemed to become slower when Jane’s mind registered what Frankie had asked her. Sighing, she looked at Korsak’s empty desk and glanced back to her coffee already meditating how much her brother could actually know from her stubborn mother and how much of that was mere elucubrations of the adorable yet too straight-forward woman.

“Frankie” She started while groaning, her right hand clenching the pencil she was supposed to be working with. Her coffee cup was empty and part of her wondered if standing and going for more would make the conversation disappear alongside with his brother open concern. “What has Ma exactly tell you?” She finally asked, opting for the more vague answer she could find while thinking on a way to make her mother stop with whatever she was doing.

However her brother was still her brother and so the young Rizzoli tilted his head to one side as he proceeded to shake his head slowly, a soft look touching his pupils while looking at her just like he knew made Jane crazy.

“Sis, don’t bother, Ma told me that you were going to ask that first thing. Why don’t you tell me what have happened between you two this time?”

Jane swallowed and pushed her body against her chair moving slightly backwards as she analyzed her brother’s words, it seemed that the man didn’t know anything about what her mother was trying to do but she knew Frankie as well as the man knew her and she knew that her brother wouldn’t have done anything like that without first wanting to know their mother’s opinion.

Sighing she push back a rebel strand of hair and locked her eyes with her brother’s the young man playing with his interlaced fingers as the silence they were both in continued. Jane felt her mouth filling up with the words she had been unable to utter since everything had started but she gulped them back, still not sure how much she could told her brother or even how much of her own suspicious were true and not just figment of her imagination.

“Sis…” Frankie finally told her after two other detectives entered in the room and left, leaving behind the strong smell of cigarettes. His eyes were still completely fixed on Jane’s and the detective knew that she wasn’t going to be able to hold everything for much longer.

Admitting defeat she nodded grudgingly and sighed, tiredness suddenly clouding her whole body.

“You should know by now that I don’t like to talk about this things on the station” She finally said behind tired eyelids and even if Frankie kept looking at her the man smiled and nodded, knowing that he had won- or Jane had let him won- this time. “Ma called me yesterday because she wanted to… talk with me”

The lie felt heavy on her tongue and for a second she raised her right brow, wondering why she was suddenly having problems with such a little lie, it was true that her mother had wanted to talk, that wasn’t the whole truth though and her body felt suddenly ill. _“Maybe that’s how Maura feels when she tries to lie”_ Jane thought for a second before shaking her head and returning back to her brother who was looking at her skeptically.

“About?” Frankie said after it was obvious that Jane wasn’t going to provide any more information. Opening his eyes he become his voice a whisper and moved forward “Is this because of Casey?”

Jane wanted to laugh, wondering if everything would have been easier if her mother was only trying to play matchmaker once again with her. Still, her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by Maura’s words about Casey and, sighing, she shook her head, her mind already on somewhere else where his brother couldn’t quite reach her.

“Jane” Frankie said as carefully as possible “Then if it’s not because of Casey and since I’m being the one who she sent… what was she wanted to talk about?”

“Just stuff”  The woman replied while moving her left hand as vague as possible “She just decided that in the middle of the night was the best moment to do it and I needed sleep.”

Her brother hummed and nodded and as Jane looked down to the blank reports she smiled slightly, believing she had defeated her noisy mother but as the seconds passed and Frankie kept sitting next to her without any intentions to move she raised her head and looked at the narrowed eyes of her brother.

“She is just worried, you know” Frankie finally said shrugging a little when Jane scowled. “It’s true Jane, you know her; she wants the best for us”

“Sometimes we only need to be alone” Jane replied while doodling in one of the corners of the papers, a slight phantom ache on both of her hands made her grimace. “I don’t understand why she sent you”

“Because you wouldn’t talk to her and probably Maura didn’t want to tell her yesterday when they talked what she wanted to know” Frankie replied in exasperation.

Jane’s body stilled and turned to look at her brother who was now frowning. Glancing slightly to her right Jane saw that Korsak was talking with a few other detectives and for a second she thought about pretending that the conversation she was having with Frankie was a mere nonsense and calling for her partner was the only smart thing to do. However, another part of her, the one who made her a decent detective, wanted to know why Frankie would have mentioned Maura when the woman hadn’t been with her mother’s last night.

“Maura couldn’t have told Ma anything, she had a date yesterday” She blurted out and Frankie sighed before shaking his own head pointing at Jane while dropping his voice trying not to make their conversation something to talk about to the squad.

“That’s what you are going to focus about? Ma told me that Maura and she had a talk when she returned home but Maura didn’t answer to Ma’s questions. She is just worried about you sis. And I am too” The brutal honesty of Frankie made Jane stop her own response and for a second both siblings kept looking at each other, Frankie slightly out of breath and fidgeting with his tie when his older sister didn’t reply to him.

“Why are you worried about me?” Jane finally asked and this time it was Frankie who pushed his body against the back of the chair while looking at his sister sternly.

“Because you look like shit, you have been like that since…  I don’t know the bridge perhaps and I suppose Ma just wanted to make you open up with someone. Maybe even with Maura, you guys haven’t been as close as before these past few weeks. Ma just… asked me to talk to you ok?” His brother soft accent thickened when the man felt Jane’s eyes on him and for a moment he looked exactly like the little boy he had been once while trying to keep a secret from their parents even if Jane knew that Frankie was the good one.

Sighing, the woman nodded and stood, grabbing her phone in the process and touching her brother’s shoulder with her other hand.

“I will talk with Ma ok?” Her voice was gentle and Frankie found himself smiling at her even if Jane had yet to answer to what he was dreading; that Jane wasn’t even talking with Maura about what she was feeling. Swallowing the bitter memory of a destroyed Jane after Hoyt’s event he waited until her sister left the room and stood up, going directly to the elevators after waving briefly to a curious Korsak.

Meanwhile Jane was trying to talk with Angela, her call going directly to voice mail. Suspecting that her mother was forcing her to talk with her face to face she resigned and, with a final decision, she left the station not before asking Korsak to call her if anything about the dead body appeared.

* * *

 

_A few days after the bridge debacle Jane was talking to Maura over another dead body, their normal banter lacking its usual wit and afer another joke that Maura didn’t address Jane finally moved closer to her friend._

_“So, how is everything going with Jack and his daughter?” Maura smiled dreamily and Jane felt a bitter taste on the roof of her mouth as the woman before her took her time explaining how Jack’s daughter had been a delightful company._

_“She is a lot like his father” She finally finished with her eyes shimmering “I found very refreshing to talk to her, not as terrifying as I suspected”_

_“I’m glad you had fun” Jane replied as Maura take its time to look at something of the woman’s body she was examining. “I knew you were going to do it great”_

_“No you weren’t” Maura replied quickly, almost if the thought had escaped her mind in a lapsus and Jane found herself looking at her profile. “You and your mother asked me to behave differently for that child”_

_“We only wanted to tell you what girls of that age are now talking about” Jane responded but even to her own ears the comments was weak and she closed her eyes, briefly wondering if Maura’s obvious discomfort had been always that she should have seen before that moment._

_Probably yes, sighing Jane tried to turn back to Maura and talk to her but found the Medical Examiner looking at her with the same tiredness that she had been sporting the night after the bridge and the detective couldn’t utter a word under the woman’s eyes._

_“Before I forget” Maura finally said “I’m going to be with Jack and his daughter this weekend. Can we move our scheduled film night to the next one?”_

_Jane had nodded, painfully aware of her own stupidity as Maura pointed out the irregularities on the woman’s body that pointed to a carefully planned murder._


End file.
